Thursday, May 17, 2012

NLN Part 4 - Life Makes Love Look Hard

Time for the last installment of this No Longer Newlyweds series.  I really hope nobody out there is breathing a sigh of relief at that. I hope these have been fun and interesting and not soap boxy.

Taylor Swift has a song that has this line in it:  Life makes love look hard.  Now I know there are some folks out there who are not Taylor Swift fans, my husband included, but I'm a fan and I like this song.   (Sidenote: one thing I don't like is that the music video seems to portray her as an accountant whose job is booooring and she hates it.  Lame.  Accounting is so hot right now... )

Life makes love look hard.  Is that true?  Is love hard?

I think love is fun and adventurous. I think sometimes it is hilarious, sometimes it is day to day mundane.   I think it brings so much joy and can really make you think and grow.  I think love is amazing.  But yes, I think love is hard.  I'm not necessarily talking about the rough patches, the arguments, the growing pains or the dirty dishes.   Let's go a little deeper than that.  A big part of loving someone is being selfless.  And let's face it.  Being selfless is hard.

When you love someone, you give a lot of yourself: time, attention, a listening ear, service, protection, kindness, affection, support.  This could be an "I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine" kind of way.  But what about something more like "I'll scratch your back because I love you and I know it makes you happy"?  Sometimes it's hard to show love without expecting something in return, especially when you are showing love by doing something that isn't super fun to you or doesn't come easily to you.  

How about we determine to give it a try though?  Being selfless is hard.  Sometimes love is hard. But let's do it.  What are some ways you can selflessly show love to your spouse today?

Our first married Christmas, 2008

P.S. Though I didn't plan for this to happen, there is a country music reference in each of these NLN posts (assuming you believe Taylor Swift is country, which my husband does not).  The first person to find them all and put them in a comment below gets an imaginary cookie!

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